


Saga

by servicetopthor



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Thor (Movies)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Eventual Fluff, M/M, Marriage Proposal, Odin (Marvel)'s Bad Parenting, Pining, Post-Avengers: Endgame (Movie), Pre-Thor (2011), Sibling Incest, to
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-05
Updated: 2019-11-05
Packaged: 2021-01-22 17:55:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 6,091
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21306173
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/servicetopthor/pseuds/servicetopthor
Summary: “I’m here to ask for Loki’s hand in marriage,” Thor stated, his voice shaking but his stature firm.Any hint of humour fell from Odin’s face.Or: Thor's hidden feelings for Loki, throughout the years.
Relationships: Loki/Thor (Marvel)
Comments: 22
Kudos: 427
Collections: Thorki Bingo 2019





	1. Chapter 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Most of the thorki I've written has been from Loki's POV. I wanted to really delve into Thor and his emotions and possible motivations, so this happened.
> 
> This chapter starts pre-thor and ends at The Scene in infinity war. Second chapter will be post-endgame focused. The next chapter is finished. I'm working through the final edits and will get it up ASAP.
> 
> Enjoy! I know I enjoyed writing it. <3
> 
> (This is for my square "proposal" on my thorki bingo card.)

Thor’s heart thumped more wildly than it did in the heat of battle. He had made sure his armour was clean and hair braided to suit a royal meeting. Not just a royal meeting, a royal proposal meeting. Hopefully. Norns, did Thor hope.

“My son!” Odin greeted from where he sat on his throne. Frigga was at his side, the both of them waiting just as Thor had requested of them. “I am immensely curious why you have called us here.”

Thor cleared his throat. He opened his mouth to speak the words he had practiced in the mirror for ages now. He had thought about this for so long, now that the moment he had came he felt tongue-tied. 

There were many times when Thor had wished for Loki’s gift of words. He could charm even Odin and Frigga into giving him what he wanted. Thor often confided in him for advice when Thor had such wishes. But he could not this time. That would ruin all of Thor’s plans.

“Allfather, Mother,” Thor began. He tilted his chin up, defying the lack of confidence he suddenly felt. It was strange, the worry gnawing within him. He wanted this to go well, desperately needed this to go well. He wasn’t sure what to do if it didn’t. “I am here for your blessing in marriage.”

The eyebrow above the golden eyepatch twitched upward. “I don’t know what lies your brother has told you, but you’re supposed to ask for the bride’s father’s blessing.”

Frigga was watching intently, not quite as amused as Odin was. Thor, usually unable to read subtle expressions, knew she understood what Thor was here for. Still, she did not correct the Allfather. She waited for Thor to.

“I’m here to ask for Loki’s hand in marriage,” Thor stated, his voice shaking but his stature firm.

Any hint of humour fell from Odin’s face. It made Thor’s stomach drop. “Loki… You wish… to marry your brother,” Odin spoke slowly, as if trying to make sense of the notion as he voiced it aloud.

“It is not unheard of in royal families. There are plenty of Aesir nobles who have wed siblings! Even you and Mother are second cousins—”

“Thor,” Odin cut off. “Is Loki aware of your feelings?”

“No.”

“He knows nothing of this meeting?”

“No, Father, but let—”

“Hush! Thor, you will marry a noble maiden, as will your brother,” Odin stated, sole eye frighteningly cold as he gazed upon his eldest son.

“If you are worried about an heir, Loki is a skilled shapeshifter. He and I can certainly produce a child,” Thor continued to bargain, hoping his words pierced his father’s ears.

“It has nothing to do with that, Thor. You do not understand now, but one day perhaps you will. You do not have my blessing and you may never speak of this foolish idea again. Your brother can never hear it, do you understand?” 

Thor wanted to argue more. He had much more to say, but he met his mother’s eyes. They begged him to settle. Thor gulped, swallowing his hefty pride. He nodded to his father. “Yes. I promise, my lips are sealed.”

His eyes stung and throat dried. This was not how he expected this to go. It was a nightmare come true, his worst nightmare. He stared at the golden floor, numbness overcoming him.

“Good,” Odin replied. “I am sorry, my son.”

Thor stomped out of the throne room, calling Mjolnir to his grasp and hearing thunder explode in the skies.

\---

He found refuge in his mother’s study that night, clinging to her as he had as a babe. 

She sat silently upon the sofa when Thor stormed in, snarling curses at the Allfather that would certainly have him damned to Hel. As soon as his weight hit the cushion beside her, his words became sobs.

Thor had never questioned his father’s judgement before. He hadn’t known at the time, but it would be far from the last time.

Frigga’s gentle hands combed through Thor’s hair. “I cannot speak for your father, Thor. I know not his reasoning.”

Thor grip on his mother’s arm tightened. “I love him,” was all he could say in response, voice croaking helplessly.

Loki so often brought joy in places that Thor thought there could be none. He could make Thor laugh even through the thunder of a poor day. And when they fought together, they were truly unstoppable. They could be magnificent rulers to Asgard, rivaled only by their parents.

And Loki lit a fire in Thor unlike any maiden. So often Thor got lost as Loki explained the details of a prank they were to pull together, distracted by Loki’s perfect mouth and what it could do to Thor. There were times when anger got the best of them and they fought, pushed, tumbled. Loki would squirm when Thor finally got him pinned against the ground, the wall, a tree, a bookshelf, and one memorable occasion — Thor’s own bed. Loki always let out defeated little grunts that Thor could so easily place into a different context. Loki’s cool fingers were never soothing on Thor’s skin, only maddening.

And Thor would have to resist for the entirety of his life, just because King Odin had decreed it so.

“I know, dear,” Frigga replied. “And you still can. He will always be your brother.”

Thor did not reply. Tears streamed down his cheeks, making him feel childish, as if Loki was a mere puppy love crush. He wasn’t.

“Or, perhaps, Odin will allow it one day,” Frigga continued. “If you two are fated to be together, you will both find a way.”

Thor held onto that hope. But years passed. Decades. Centuries.

Thor desperately tried to love another. But he compared every fair lady’s skin to the glow of his brother’s. Few were willing to be blunt and sarcastic with Thor, too afraid of offending the crown prince. 

All things considered, Thor did make progress in moving on. Until Odin threw a, as the Midgarians say, curveball.

“Now presenting Lady Sigyn,” a royal guard proclaimed before an auburn-haired maiden strode into the dining hall. 

Thor stared at her in disbelief as she introduced herself to Loki. Odin had mentioned he wanted to marry off Loki, but Thor had thought it was an angry bluff after Thor ran off with Loki on a hunting trip to avoid a visit from a Vanir noblewoman keen on seducing Thor.

It appeared it wasn’t a bluff. The maiden laughed at something Loki said, causing Loki to beam brightly.

Thor’s jaw clenched. He met his mother’s eyes. They held a twinge of sympathy along with a _ do not ruin this _sternness. 

Thor could resist a tantrum, even when he could feel a storm brewing in the distance. He was civil throughout the whole feast. He nearly broke a chalice with his grip when Loki allowed the woman to feed him bites off her plate, her eyes fixed on Loki’s delicate mouth.

Thor wanted to tip over the table and cause a scene, scare away this young maiden who dared try to charm the silver-tongued prince. Sure, Loki likes the attention but he would soon grow bored of her. Soon was not enough.

When Loki excused himself to the washroom, Thor decided to strike. He took a seat in his brother’s vacant chair and leaned into the maiden’s space. “I see you’re in need of company, Lady Sigyn” he said in as charming of a tone as he could manage.

“Oh, no, your brother promised to return soon,” she responded faintly.

Thor winced. “Ah, I’m very sorry. He told me to entertain you, as he as some work to tend to.”

Sigyn was clever enough to understand the implications. Disappointment welled in her eyes. “That’s a… shame.”

“Do not fret! I’d feel honoured if I were you. You held his attention for nearly the entire evening. He rarely gives suitresses more than five minutes of his precious time,” Thor lied with an ease that only came after growing up alongside Loki.

Sigyn’s sadness flickered into anger. “I’ll be retiring now,” she said curtly before rushing out of the dining hall, her aides hurriedly following her.

When Loki returned to the hall a moment later, his face fell. Thor swallowed the lump in his throat.

\---

The idea came to him as an innocent child. His little brother Loki was his best friend. The two inseparable. Thor thought of his brother even when he was supposed to be focusing on getting needed rest.

Frigga had been reading him bedtime stories of kings and queens. Young Thor has foolishly asked if Loki could be his queen, delighted by the tales of royal couples leading side by side, fighting grand battles together.

Frigga had stayed composed. She gave a non-answer about how Thor may someday find someone else he wants to marry.

It would have been a perfect response, had it become true. 

It didn’t.

Thor followed Odin’s wishes. Demands, really. He did not tell Loki his true feelings. His aching, unbrotherly feelings. 

If Loki suspected anything, he never voiced it. 

Not after his true heritage was revealed, not before he plunged into the void. 

That whirlwind of a few days… Thor could remember the joy of anticipation as he waited to be crowned king, the horror as he was stripped of power and cast out to Midgard, the feeling of relief as he thought, maybe, he could love Jane, and then…

Loki was gone, in more ways than one.

When Loki resurfaced on Midgard, Thor thought his feelings were truly gone. He loved his brother, but now it was so twisted and cold. He was outraged and upset. It was different.

But it wasn’t gone.

He loved Jane too. For a time. 

His love for Loki had waned, yet it could never leave. It was as constant as the thunder in Thor’s chest.

\---

_ “I didn’t do it for him.” _

Loki was gone. Again.

After the funeral, a short, private ceremony between father and son, they shared a drink. Thor had plans to return to Midgard the following day, although he had not told Odin that yet. He wanted to be at Jane’s side. He could not stand being in an Asgard without his mother and brother.

Just before Thor decides to turn in for the night, he stared at his father pointedly, hoping his gaze would somehow state the words he wasn’t sure he could voice.

Odin raised an eyebrow. “What is it, my son?”

“You had said… one day I would understand. I do, partially. I never will completely,” Thor stated.

Odin didn’t say anything. He sat across the table and waits.

“Was it because of his true heritage?” Thor prompted, curious to know his father’s answer.

Odin was hesitant. “It… played a part.”

Thor nodded. “Perhaps if you would have let us marry, he would have never figured it out. He would have never pushed you or me away. Or we could have united Asgard and Jotunheim together. Instead, he died in the dirt Svartalfheim.”

Odin stared at Thor’s clenched fists resting on the table. “I think it’s time you rest.”

Thor sighed, holding back a sob. “Goodnight, father.”

\---

He tried to make things work with Jane. They didn’t. They were doomed from the beginning, Thor knew, and yet he still desperately tried.

After their relationship fell apart, he took a trip around the universe to find the infinity stones. It was a distraction. A good one, until he flew too close to the sun and needed Heimdall to get him to safety.

But Heimdall wasn’t in Asgard.

Thor thought he knew the strongest anger. It was sharp like lightning. It was undeniable and unignorable. It was what he felt when the Frost Giants halted his coronation, it was what he felt when the Dark Elves slew his mother, and it was what he felt when Loki died in his arms.

Then Odin morphed into Loki and Thor’s heart only felt numb. Loki stood before, grinning and alive, and Thor only felt numb. 

It was hard for Thor to recall everything that followed. One moment Loki was suddenly alive and Odin was suddenly dead. He had a sister, then watched her fight the fire of Ragnarok. There was a Valkyrie, and Banner, and a Kronan, and _ Loki. _

Loki, up to his usual tricks.

Loki, there when needed most to save the day.

Loki—

_ “I’m here,” _ Loki said with a smile. 

The numbness finally dripped away, leaving Thor’s chest burning with warmth and his head spinning. It had been so long since he felt his love so strongly, so purely. Loki was back, not for Odin or Frigga or some twisted plans of seeking power. He was back for Thor.

Thor hugged him. He leaned down to hear Loki’s pulse in his neck, another confirmation that _ Loki was alive and here. _ “Do not leave me again, brother,” Thor whispered.

“Only if you don’t make me,” Loki replied, his voice so soft it made Thor’s eyes flutter closed.

They stepped back, untangling limbs and standing tall once again. Loki looked like he was expecting something. A thank you, an apology, an offer, Thor couldn’t tell what.

Valkyrie was shouting Thor’s name from the hallway of the Statesman.

“Let’s go,” Thor said.

Loki tried to hide his confusion but Thor saw it. He did not know what to think of it.

\---

Odin was gone, as was Frigga. Thor had full authority over his life. He was King of Asgard. He could do whatever his heart desired.

And yet, he did not confess his feelings to Loki.

His lips still felt sealed. The reality of it, the true possibility of being with Loki scared Thor in ways it never had. When he was young and foolish, he spared little thought for Loki’s feelings. He had no idea if Loki felt the same, then or now. He hadn’t cared. His feelings were strong enough he was willing to risk it. At the very least, Loki would be lured at the thought of ruling side-by-side.

Now, Thor did not hold the same arrogance. If he confessed and Loki declined, it would break him. Loki could be disgusted or uninterested or any variable reasons and it would shatter Thor’s soul. He couldn’t risk pushing Loki away after just getting him back.

So he didn’t say anything. 

The Statesman drove on, approaching Midgard at a turtle’s pace.

There wasn’t much time for Thor’s turmoil. The Asgardians needed him, for this and that and being a king was truly a full-time gig.

It was only when they would stand side-by-side, looking out at the vast blackness of space, that Thor was reminded how much he wanted to grasp Loki’s hand, to kiss his cheek, to push him against—

Thor always turned his thoughts elsewhere. He had to.

\---

“Loki!” the Valkyrie’s voice could be heard screaming down the hall. It was the only warning he got before Loki appeared at his side and shoved him into a nearby storage closet.

“What’s going on?” Thor demanded, hoping Loki could not feel how hard his heart was beating in his chest. Both of Loki’s pale hands were pressed to Thor, keeping him pressed to the back wall of the closet.

“A harmless prank, dear brother,” Loki laughed, his voice breathless. “She’ll get over it soon enough.”

“And why must I hide with you?” Thor asked. He tried to keep a smile off his face but it crept onto his lips despite himself.

“For my protection, of course,” Loki replied with his own lazy smirk.

“Ah, I see,” Thor chuckled. “This is like the times you’d hide from Mother in my room.”

“You were always such an excellent actor. _ No, Mother, I have not seen Loki this morning. Is he alright? Shall I look with you? _” Loki recalled fondly, mimicking a child’s voice. “Sometimes I wondered why you would put up with it.”

_ I’d do anything for you, _ rang in Thor’s head but went unsaid.

Thor will always wonder what went wrong between them. In hindsight, he can see his arrogance, his thirst for a fight, his little regard for the finer details of ruling a kingdom. Loki, younger and uncorrupted by envy, would have made a better ruler.

Still, had jealousy for the throne alone drove Loki to such madness? No, it was Odin’s lies as well, Thor knew. And perhaps there was more that Loki would never say. Even as children, Loki kept his secrets close to his heart. Thor knew he’d never fully understand him and his choices. He would choose to not let it bother him and appreciate the fact that Loki was with him again. They could banter and reminisce and hide away together all over again.

“Do you think she’s gone?” Loki questioned, cracking the door open to peek into the hall.

“I can go check,” Thor offered. 

Loki nodded yet a hand was still firmly pressed to Thor’s chest.

Thor lifted his own hand to move Loki’s. Loki seemed a bit startled but swiftly returned his hand to his side.

Thor struggled to remember the last time he had touched Loki’s skin. He had pressed a hand to Loki’s jabbering mouth in moments of anger, he had bruised and battered his brother in numerous fights, he had held him in his convincing death scene. 

They had hugged. Yes, a week or so ago, they had hugged.

Thor let his rush of emotions overtake him. He pulled Loki into a hug, gripping with more force than he had even a few weeks ago.

Loki didn’t say anything. He patted Thor’s shoulder once. 

When Thor pulled back, Loki was watching him intently. Studying him, probably trying to formulate some sort of mind-reading spell.

“Sentiment,” he tsked, finally looking away.

Thor grinned and opened the closet door. He stepped into the hall, finding it clear. He turned back to Loki, finding his intense gaze back on him.

“She’s gone,” Thor stated.

“Good,” Loki replied, stepping out into the hall. “I’ll find you again if I need my king’s protection.”

Thor stood frozen as he watched Loki wander down the hall.

_ My king… _

It fell so casually from his lips.

Thor had accepted his position over Asgard. He was their king.

But Loki… He never dared to think such a thing. Not after everything.

Loki was no one’s subject but his own. He’d follow no one’s lead but his own. He trusted no one’s mind but his own.

He had trusted Thor’s harebrained plan to bring havoc to Asgard to defeat their sister. 

_ “You'll always be the God of Mischief,” _ Thor had said fondly

And he truly had meant it fondly.

_ “But you could be so much more.” _

Thor meant that too.

Maybe Loki was starting to believe it.

\---

_ “I assure you, brother… the sun will shine on us again.” _

Thor had fooled himself into believing this was played. He had seen his brother die, twice. The pain of it so eerily familiar, and yet each time it always felt different.

The first time, Thor was in denial. And he was confused. And angry.

The second, Thor didn’t know what to do with himself. He had felt a glimmer of what they once were and before he could even dream of things returning to the old ways, Loki was dead.

_ “I, Loki, Prince of Asgard… Odinson…” _

And now, they _ were _ what they once were. And more. They were leading Asgard together like they imagined as children. Sure, there was no palace and Thor’s relationship with Loki wasn’t _ exactly _what he wanted it to be. But it was enough.

Fear flooded Thor when Thanos’ fingers wrapped around Loki’s neck.

He wasn’t ready for this. Not again. Not so soon. 

He hadn’t told him. He should have told him. He’ll never be able to tell him.

There was a crack and a thud and Thor was desperately crawling to him. He barely had any time to hold his brother, to say goodbye, before the ship was collapsing. Thor was hurled into space, letting his exhaustion overtake him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading so far <3
> 
> In the meantime, I'm taking requests based on my thorki bingo card and another prompt table. Help me decide what to write next! You can leave requests at [this post](https://skyrosebud.dreamwidth.org/11214.html) on my dreamwidth.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> <3

Thanos’ victory added to Thor’s pain. 

And Thor thought he knew pain. Punches and kicks to the chest. Hurtling through space and landing on Sakaar. Losing his parents. The Power stone threatening to blow up his brains.

This pain was so strong, he only felt numb.

The remaining Asgardians did their best to pick up the pieces. They settled in Norway and built a new life, a new kingdom.

Thor’s mind only wandered to Loki in his dreams. He saw him dying, he saw him killing. Loki showed little emotion in them, like he had become numb too.

Thor always awoke shivering after such dreams, with his eyes wet.

Thor drank. He was already numb, why not drink?

He already brought ruin to his people, why lead them?

He lost to Thanos once, why try again?

He does anyway.

\---

It felt like centuries since he had seen his mother. It had been mere years, barely a decade.

When she held him, the numbness waned. She was bright and comforting and Thor wished he could stay with her. He wished he could save her and Loki and Odin and everyone.

“You said once,” Thor remembered, speaking through his persistent tears. “If Loki and I are fated to be together, we will find a way.”

“Yes,” Frigga agreed. “And I still believe it.”

“There’s no way…” Thor breathed, the words hardly forming.

“Don’t underestimate your brother,” Frigga assured. “He always finds a way.”

Thor smiled even though doubt still weighed his heart down. 

Perhaps he would meet his brother in Valhalla, many centuries from now, and finally be able to tell him what he should have said countless times before.

Thor could wait. He’s already waited so long.

They managed to defeat Thanos. They lost Tony and Natasha. Rocket got his family back and he invited Thor onto their ship. 

Thor wasn’t meant to rule Asgard, not alone, so he accepted the offer. 

Valkyrie’s reaction was incredulous, but she accepted too. Thor wasn’t sure what he would have done if she hadn’t. Maybe she knew that. 

He liked the Guardians. It was like being with the Avengers, in the old days. When they were fighting meaningless robots and Thor’s smile still reached his eyes.

He still dreamt of Loki. He thought being away from New Asgard would lessen them. Instead, he dreamt of his brother nearly every night. He always woke up cold, like winter had settled in during the short hours he had slept.

When they stopped to refuel, Thor bought extra blankets at the local marketplace. It didn’t help. The cold got worse. Thor began to wonder if he was sick, which was odd. Asgardians rarely suffered from illnesses. 

Then, he dreamt again. The night after another mercenary job finished. He had been exhausted, dropping onto his bunk and falling asleep immediately.

_ Brother. _

He could see Loki. Letting go of the staff, falling into space.

_ Thor. _

Then, a memory of them in the wilderness. They were quite young. Thor watched Loki light a campfire with nothing but his palms. 

_ You’re close. _

It was a recent scene. Just after the destruction of Asgard, five years ago. They were hiding in a closet, Thor couldn’t remember why, and Thor was moving Loki’s hand. His skin was cool.

_ Find me. _

Thor jolted up in his bed with a gasp. When he exhaled, he could see his breath. His shoulders shook as he wrapped himself in his thickest blanket. He rushed to the ship’s control room, thankful that he was the first one up.

He searched through the ship’s coordinates log. He found what he was looking for, dated five years back. He changed course, hoping the Guardians would understand the urgency.

When they awoke, they were confused and slightly pissed off. They had another job lined up, one with a mighty payout, but they trusted Thor. They understood.

They found the cloud of space junk. It should be hard to spot him amongst it all. Thor saw him immediately.

He looked dead. His eyes were glued open as floated motionlessly. 

The Guardians made him wear a flight suit. It felt ridiculous, unnecessary, he wanted to go and save his brother  _ now. _ He listened, knowing the thoughts in his head were irrational.

When he reached Loki, he still looked dead. His chest did not rise or fall. 

Thor pressed a hand to Loki’s wrist, desperate to find a pulse. He retracted his hand immediately, as Loki’s skin was so cold it burned.

Like the skin of a Frost Giant.

He froze himself, Thor realized. He felt himself grinning at the thought. Loki  _ had _ found a way. Loki was  _ alive. _

Barely, Thor reminded himself, and carefully carried Loki to the ship.

\---

As they sped back to Midgard, Thor wondered if Loki got the idea from Steve. He doubted it, there was a good chance that Loki wasn’t aware that Steve had spent seventy years frozen in ice. 

The Asgardian healers confirmed it. They explained in times of famine or injury, the Jotun could go into a comatose. Their body temperature dropped dramatically, freezing themselves from the inside out. Loki’s body likely did it on instinct. It was possible it was how Loki survived his first aimless drift in the abyss of space.

They also gave him the bad news that it would be a while until they can wake his brother. His injuries were severe. If he woke too soon, the pain would shock his body into another coma. They would have to let him heal considerably.

Thor would sit at Loki’s bedside until his mind began to drive him wild with and he would have to take a walk in the chilly air of Norway’s autumn.

The bruises on Loki’s neck made Thor’s stomach churn. 

“I swear, brother, if you die again, I will kill you,” Thor said one afternoon after returning from another walk. 

He could almost imagine Loki’s laughter filling the room.

The silence weighed on Thor. 

The healers said Loki likely wouldn’t be able to talk when he woke. They expect it to return eventually. Hopefully. It mattered little to Thor. As long as Loki was alive and healthy, he would be happy. 

Thor was holding Loki’s hand, studying it, noting its temperature, when Loki began to stir. His temperature had risen to a point where Thor could touch his skin again, but it was still cold. Too cold. Like the chill of a dead body.

His bruising had yellowed, a sign of progress that the healers were sure to tell Thor. Any day, Loki could awake on his own terms. Thor asked why the healers couldn’t wake him with a spell, but they countered it was better for Loki’s body to decide.

And he finally did, while Thor gripped his hand. Thor had been inspecting his brother’s hand so intently he didn’t even notice Loki’s eyes opening. Loki’s hand suddenly was squeezing Thor’s back. Thor jumped at the feeling, looking up to find Loki’s eyes staring at him. 

“Loki,” Thor said, his mouth stretching into a smile.

Loki opened his mouth, trying to say something. All that came from his mouth was a harsh sound somewhere between a cough and a groan.

Thor shushed. “The healers said you wouldn’t be able to talk for a while.”

Loki frowned at that, his lips formed a pout and Thor felt so warm.

“I missed you,” Thor said. “It’s been five years. I thought you were dead.”

Loki frowned at that too, his mouth opening to try again. He stopped himself, suddenly reaching out to Thor. His thumb stroked Thor’s forehead, around his eyes, and onto his cheek. He traced the faint scar, taking in the sight of Thor’s fake eye.

“A rabbit gave it to me,” Thor explained and Loki gave him a disbelieving look.

Before Thor could think of something else to say, Loki was suddenly overcome with shivers.

Thor didn’t hesitate to wrap his arms around Loki. He probably should have ran off to find a healer. But then, Loki’s pulling away and patting the mattress. Thor climbed into the bed, pressing his body to Loki. Thor hugged Loki and Loki gripped Thor. A few minutes and Loki’s shivers have subsided.

Thor didn’t leave.

Loki didn’t push him away.

\---

With Loki awake, he was able to perform healing spells on himself. Thor watched in awe as Loki weaved his magic, looking every bit like Frigga, who likely taught him such spells.

Thor gave Loki some space. Loki liked to have moments of privacy, even when they were inseparable children. It was hard for Thor. He never wanted to let Loki out of his sight.

It gave him to think, at least. Now that Loki was awake and nearing good health, Thor needed to think.

He could remember the aching regret in his chest as he watched Loki’s body be tossed carelessly to the ground. Thor had to tell Loki. He couldn’t make excuses anymore. The Norns had agreed with Frigga, had smiled down at Thor. They were fated to be together, in some fashion. If Thor confessed and Loki did not feel the same, it would not ruin him. Thor had been ruined time and time again. As long as Loki remained at his side, even if only as his brother, Thor would be content.

And if Loki felt the same way…

Thor would ensure they would remain at each other’s sides forever. In the realms of the living and in Valhalla.

Thor drafted several confessions in his mind. They were clumsy and childlike and too simple for everything they’d gone through. Thor could remember standing in front of his mirror, planning out his words for when he asked for Odin’s blessing, and then his proposal speech to Loki. It was long-winded and flowery and meant to please the intellect of Loki’s mind. It was ridiculous coming from Thor.

Thor knew he would have to wait a bit longer. He wanted Loki to have his voice back and his full strength again. If Thor was willing to wait for Valhalla to confess, he could surely wait for Loki to heal.

He did spend most of his time in Loki’s room. He filled Loki in on all that had happened in his five year slumber. The snap, the blip. The settling of New Asgard, handing the throne to Valkyrie. Loki wrinkled his nose at that. 

“You’d be surprised,” Thor assured. “She’s done more to help our people rebuild than I have.”

Loki looked like he wanted to say something. He always did. 

It made Thor wonder what Loki’s first words would be, once his voice finally returned. A question was probable. A sarcastic insult equally so. Maybe something poetic or dramatic about death. Or even just Thor’s name.

It ended up being none of those.

That day, Thor had burst into Loki’s room excitedly. He had just came from a town meeting led by Valkyrie. They were finalizing plans to expand the schoolhouse, as many new Aesir children had been born following Hela’s short reign and Thanos’ slaughter. Asgard was healing and growing.

Thor babbled on about it, naming some of the newly expanded families that Loki would be familiar with, as well as some surprising new couples that had formed. His excitement must have been infectious, as Loki’s lips slowly stretched into an amused smirk.

Thor eventually found his mouth halting, his mind unable to think of anything else entertaining or informative to say. He let the silence settle into the room. It no longer bothered him.

Then, it was Loki who shattered it.

“I’m glad you grew out your hair again,” he said, his casual expression betrayed by the scratchy tone of his voice.

Thor couldn’t help the chuckle that burst out of them. Of all the things Loki could have said, he chose that.

“I didn’t realize you had such strong opinions on my hair,” Thor mused, voice still light with laughter. 

“I have strong opinions on everything about you,” Loki replied. “But I doubt you’d like to hear most of them.”

Thor silently disagreed. He could listen to Loki’s voice for hours, even if it was only insults to his appearance. He was so glad to hear it again.

\---

A day later and Loki was back to his full health. Or close enough, as the healers finally let Loki out of bed. 

Thor took him on a tour of the town. As they walked, he could see Loki’s mind ticking away, likely thinking of ideas for improvements he would relay to Valkyrie. He had already made it known to Thor that while Thor no longer saw himself as King, Loki would not be resigning his role as Prince. Thor could already see Valkyrie and Loki butting heads.

A few townsfolk come up to Loki, wishing him good health and such. Most kept their distance. 

They ended their stroll looking over the cliff’s edge. They were not standing in the exact place they were when their father died, Thor knew, but he could not shake the sense of deja vu. 

Thor had long accepted he would never understand his father’s decisions. His decision to lock up Hela, his decision to lie to Loki, his decision to forbid Thor’s proposal. It would never make any sense. But Odin was gone, he had been for years now.

And yet, Thor had finally worked up the courage to open his lips.

“I love you,” Thor stated as they both looked out at the waves and overcast sky.

“I’m aware, brother,” Loki replied.

Thor swallowed. “Not like—” he paused, trying to reformulate his words. “I mean—”

Loki’s hands were suddenly cradling Thor’s face. “I know what you mean. You told me already,” Loki cut in, his eyes so intense and yet Thor could not look away.

“What?” Thor questioned, his expression contorting with confusion.

“After Svartalfheim.”

Realization crashed over Thor like the waves below. He had completely forgotten the conversation he had with the man he thought was his father. Loki knew. All this time, he knew.

“You never said anything,” Thor breathed, completely bewildered.

“Neither did you,” Loki pointed out, his voice edging on accusatory.

It’s a fair retort, Thor knew. 

“If Odin had decided differently, and I had been allowed to propose, would you have accepted?” Thor asked because he  _ needed  _ to know the answer. 

Loki’s eyes flickered all over Thor’s face. His lips twitched before he answered, “Yes.”

Thor could barely breathe but he had to manage. He needed— “Would you marry me now, after everything?”

After the bloodshed, the deception, the regrets, the words left unsaid for so long, _ too long. _

Loki’s thumb traced the line of Thor’s jaw. He smiled. “Yes.”

Thor wondered if he should be angry, at Odin or at himself. He could have had this centuries ago, but centuries ago it would not have felt so euphoric and victorious and  _ earned. _ Thor was a better man now, he knew. A more worthy man.

Loki was a better man now too.

Thor leaned forward and kissed Loki. Loki’s fingers twisted in Thor’s hair, tugging him closer. They were both grinning, which made their movements awkward. Thor didn’t care. He’d have a whole lifetime to kiss his brother again and again and again.

When they pulled away, Thor was unsure of how long they had been standing pressed together. A wind had rolled in, blowing strands of hair into both of their faces.

_ “I never wanted the throne,” _ Loki sighed, recalling words from another lifetime.  _ “I only ever wanted to be your equal.” _

Those words had stung Thor when first uttered. Thor could remember how an agreement had stuck in his throat, unable to make its way out to Loki’s ears.  _ I want you to be my equal. You are my equal. _

“I believe it now,” Thor replied, because a part of him hadn’t the first time. He had thought Loki was hurling meaningless words to stun him. “As you haven’t shown any signs to overthrow Valkyrie.”

“Been there, done that,” Loki said with a wave. “I’m content with us being the Princes of Asgard forever.”

Thor couldn’t agree more. 

\---

“We’ll have a winter wedding,” Loki stated, his expression clear that Thor could not change his mind if he wanted.

“Of course,” Thor replied, already imagining the delicate snowflakes in Loki’s hair.

_ fin. _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kudos and comments always appreciated! <3
> 
> Again, I'm taking requests based on my thorki bingo card and another prompt table. Help me decide what to write next! You can leave requests at [this post](https://skyrosebud.dreamwidth.org/11214.html) on my dreamwidth.


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